No Monkey Business
Keswick's dedicated No & Lo bar and café on Main Street, serving brunch, speciality coffee, zero-proof cocktails, functional drinks and evening global-fusion food.
Our visit to No Monkey Business
The food at No Monkey Business was fantastic. Local dishes with a global twist. We had the Shakshuka-Stuffed Croissant, the Cumberland Sausage Bap and a portion of hash browns to share. All of the food tasted fresh, and the shakshuka gave the croissant and eggs a spicy kick. The food was very reasonably priced, we spent less than £30 for both meals, two Diet Cokes and a Chai Latte. A nice touch was that everyone gets complimentary table water, so this saved me having to buy some (does anyone else have to line up the drinks when you’re out?!).…
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The food at No Monkey Business was fantastic. Local dishes with a global twist. We had the Shakshuka-Stuffed Croissant, the Cumberland Sausage Bap and a portion of hash browns to share. All of the food tasted fresh, and the shakshuka gave the croissant and eggs a spicy kick. The food was very reasonably priced, we spent less than £30 for both meals, two Diet Cokes and a Chai Latte. A nice touch was that everyone gets complimentary table water, so this saved me having to buy some (does anyone else have to line up the drinks when you’re out?!).
The service was quick and friendly and the atmosphere was relaxed for a Sunday morning. It’s a small space yet didn’t feel too cramped. It’ll be gorgeous to sit outside and people watch on a nicer day!Check it out next time you’re in Keswick!
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About No Monkey Business
No Monkey Business is an alcohol-free and low-alcohol bar and café in the centre of Keswick, offering one of the Lake District's most unusual food and drink experiences. Located on Main Street, the independent venue specialises in sophisticated zero-proof drinks rather than simply replacing alcohol with standard soft drinks. Its drinks selection includes alcohol-free spirits, craft 0% beers, low-alcohol options and cocktails created around botanicals, adaptogens and functional ingredients. During the day, No Monkey Business operates as a Keswick café and brunch spot. Brunch is currently served daily from 9am until 4:30pm, with a menu ranging from lighter plant-focused dishes to substantial breakfasts. Current examples include Turkish eggs, smoothie bowls, French toast, Buddha bowls and a Full English featuring Cumberland sausage.
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The café also serves Ozone speciality coffee, teas, lattes and functional coffee blends. From Thursday to Saturday the venue stays open into the evening, with food served alongside its alcohol-free drinks menu. The current evening menu focuses on globally inspired dishes and street-food flavours, including slow-cooked curries, dhal, ramen-style dishes and other changing fusion bowls. The bar is particularly useful for designated drivers, people who do not drink alcohol, sober-curious visitors and anyone who wants an evening out without relying on traditional alcoholic drinks. It is also welcoming to families and dogs, making it an easy option for visitors spending the day exploring Keswick and the surrounding Lake District. No Monkey Business also functions as a small community and event space. Its programme can include quiz nights, live music, workshops and other social events, while Work Space Wednesdays provide a regular afternoon session for people looking for somewhere informal to work or catch up on admin. The venue is at 43 Main Street, within easy walking distance of Keswick Market Square, the town's shops, accommodation and bus station. There is no dedicated customer car park, so visitors arriving by car should use one of Keswick's public car parks and walk into the town centre. Opening hours, menus and individual dishes can change, particularly between seasons. Check the official No Monkey Business website before travelling if you are visiting specifically for evening food, an event or a particular menu item.
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Charming little place
The food at No Monkey Business was fantastic. Local dishes with a global twist. We had the Shakshuka-Stuffed Croissant, the Cumberland Sausage Bap and a portion of hash browns to share. All of the food tasted fresh, and the shakshuka gave the croissant and eggs a spicy kick. The food was very reasonably priced, we spent less than £30 for both meals, two Diet Cokes and a Chai Latte. A nice touch was that everyone gets complimentary table water, so this saved me having to buy some (does anyone else have to line up the drinks when you’re out?!). The service was quick and friendly and the atmosphere was relaxed for a Sunday morning. It’s a small space yet didn’t feel too cramped. It’ll be gorgeous to sit outside and people watch on a nicer day! Check it out next time you’re in Keswick!
